Many people misunderstand what “affair proofing your marriage” really means. Women tend to assume that this has everything to do with sex and intimacy. That is only part of the equation. For your marriage to really thrive and for you to be confident that your husband won’t cheat again, there are some things that absolutely have to happen.
You will have to understand why the affair happened to really be able to fix the issue. You will both need to be committed to improving your communication and intimacy so that any issues that crop up can be addressed in the appropriate ways. Too many women had no idea anything was wrong within the marriage because there was a break down in communication. You will need to understand and ask for what you need to heal. If you need more affection and reassurance, you will need to ask for it and get it so that you can shed those nagging doubts. Both of you will both need to put up safe guards so that you feel secure and trusting. This is not an overnight healing solution, it will take time and for your part as a wife you will try your hardest not to bring the affair up at the slightest opportunity.
If your husband is vulnerable on overnight business trips, when he’s out drinking, or with certain friends or collegues, then these things will absolutely have to be removed, because you won’t ultimately feel comfortable and trusting if they aren’t. Of course, you don’t have to be glued at the hip but going out of town and not being able to contact him is verboten. Likewise, you mustn’t call him every five minutes when he’s at work, difficult as that may be. Not all men who cheat, become serial cheaters. For many the hurt and pain caused is enough for them to fully realize their mistakes. So give a wide berth to the haters who yell once a cheater, always a cheater, its just not so.
When you understand why the affair happened you can work to ensure that it doesn’t again. Its important to understand that to affair proof your marriage, you understand and take care of emotional, psychological, and physical needs of BOTH parties (you too – if your needs aren’t met, you won’t have anything genuine to give your husband. You must be fulfilled and happy to be able to give this to someone else. I now understand why the affair happened and work every day to ensure that it doesn’t again. I now understand that to affair proof your marriage, you understand and take care of emotional, psychological, and physical needs of BOTH parties (you too – if your needs aren’t met, you won’t have anything genuine to give your husband. You must be fulfilled and happy to be able to give this to someone else.
How to Affair Proof your Marriage
Many people misunderstand what “affair proofing your marriage” really means. Women tend to assume that this has everything to do with sex and intimacy. That is only part of the equation. For your marriage to really thrive and for you to be confident that your husband won’t cheat again, there are some things that absolutely have to happen.
You will have to understand why the affair happened to really be able to fix the issue. You will both need to be committed to improving your communication and intimacy so that any issues that crop up can be addressed in the appropriate ways. Too many women had no idea anything was wrong within the marriage because there was a break down in communication. You will need to understand and ask for what you need to heal. If you need more affection and reassurance, you will need to ask for it and get it so that you can shed those nagging doubts. Both of you will both need to put up safe guards so that you feel secure and trusting. This is not an overnight healing solution, it will take time and for your part as a wife you will try your hardest not to bring the affair up at the slightest opportunity.
If your husband is vulnerable on overnight business trips, when he’s out drinking, or with certain friends or collegues, then these things will absolutely have to be removed, because you won’t ultimately feel comfortable and trusting if they aren’t. Of course, you don’t have to be glued at the hip but going out of town and not being able to contact him is verboten. Likewise, you mustn’t call him every five minutes when he’s at work, difficult as that may be. Not all men who cheat, become serial cheaters. For many the hurt and pain caused is enough for them to fully realize their mistakes. So give a wide berth to the haters who yell once a cheater, always a cheater, its just not so.
When you understand why the affair happened you can work to ensure that it doesn’t again. Its important to understand that to affair proof your marriage, you understand and take care of emotional, psychological, and physical needs of BOTH parties (you too – if your needs aren’t met, you won’t have anything genuine to give your husband. You must be fulfilled and happy to be able to give this to someone else. I now understand why the affair happened and work every day to ensure that it doesn’t again. I now understand that to affair proof your marriage, you understand and take care of emotional, psychological, and physical needs of BOTH parties (you too – if your needs aren’t met, you won’t have anything genuine to give your husband. You must be fulfilled and happy to be able to give this to someone else.
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